Unmarriable Women & Unrealistic Expectations

I often hear from young women complaining about men today and their unsuitability as mates. They point out to me things that I consider obvious. Young men are emotionally immature. Many live at home well into their thirties and are broke as their careers have not worked out. They may be trying to sell a screenplay, write the next War and Peace or start an internet company while they toil away at call centers. They also point out that these men quickly tire of them and become “emotionally unavailable”. (A nice way of saying that he’s not that “into you").

I am also told that “men aren’t men" anymore. I used to find this argument infuriating. Now I merely find it tedious and banal. Most young women have been influenced by feminists to at least some extent. They carp on about the patriarchy and toxic masculinity, while they dream about a masculine man coming into their lives and fixing all their problems. Of course, such a man would be a textbook toxic male to the post-modern women. This is the paradox of modern dating for woman. Their biology, as manifested through evolution, dictates that their survival and that of their children will cause them to be attracted to strong, emotionally mature and economically successful men; men who will be good protectors, providers and kind husbands and fathers. Yet, our current culture and society constantly tells women that men should be, for lack of a better term, male feminists.

It does not help the situation that young men are falling behind economically making them less appealing to potential mates. They are constantly berated by the media as being fools, losers and rapists. On situation comedies, fathers and husbands are depicted as worthless buffoons. White men, in particular, are constantly whined and told they are responsible for all of society’s problems, even if those ills are only imagined and are demonstrably false like the male/female wage gap.

Young men also have to contend with a serious epidemic of low testosterone. Although the reasons are subject to debate, the fact is that the average twenty-five year old man has significantly less testosterone than his father and grandfather had at the same age. This is a health issue and negatively affects behavioral and physical characteristics. Men have less sex drive and decreased ambition. Decreased ambition may also be the result of our society becoming more socialist. However, this may partially be a chicken and egg type question. Millennial males are far more likely to embrace socialism than Baby Boomers. Do socialistic inclinations make men less ambitious or does a lack of testosterone decrease the drive for excellence which in turn makes them prefer government handouts. Either way, it’s not sexy.

We have established that men are not what they used to be, even on a biological level. Yes, many young men today are of questionable marriage material but what about women? Women often complain about men to me and ask me what is wrong with them. I am pretty open about the issues that I discuss in this piece. I am very quick to point out that you cannot fix a man by getting into a relationship with him. Few of us can fix anyone but almost all of us can fix ourselves. Women must fix themselves first. They also need to ask what they bring to the table. In our feminist and narcissistic world women feel they have no need to ask themselves this question. They are taught to see themselves as queens and goddesses. Humility and modesty are important traits for living a virtuous and meaningful life. Apart from the obvious blasphemous nonsense, going through life thinking you are a “goddess” is a recipe for a life of dissatisfaction and loneliness.

The hard fact is that many young women today would and do make narcissistic mothers and emotionally unsupportive and even abusive wives. And some research, as well as observed logic suggests that the more left a woman is politically, the higher probability she will be a selfish and dysfunctional wife and mother. The fatherly instinct should alert males to the fact that they should not allow caustic women anywhere near their children. Men go out and secure food and shelter and have for the family for hundreds of thousands of years. We have evolved to perform this task. We entrust women with the task of protecting our genetic offspring while we toil. Men who entrusted the continuation of their genes to selfish, irresponsible or inept women saw their line die out. Those that chose better had their line continue. Women who chose good providers and protectors also saw their genes passed on.

A recent survey by Pew Research found that 56.3% of women between the ages of 18 to 29 were told by a doctor or other health professional that they had a mental health condition. The figure for young conservative women is 27.3%. A young man is literally twice as likely to end up with an unstable woman if he dates leftists than if he dates a conservative. The really bad news is that many more young women identity as leftist than they do as conservative.

Young women also have impossibly high standards for men and pretty low standards for themselves. According to some surveys, women want taller men as defined by six feet or over. That represents about 15% of the male population. They also want men who make over $100,000 a year. Less than 10% of men earn that and most of them are past marriage age or already married since income goes up with age. Put those two criteria together and your talking about less than 2% of males. Good luck with that ladies. You either better be bringing a lot to the table or have fantastic manipulation skills. Of course, manipulative women usually end up having unhappy marriages.

It doesn’t help that, as we stated, many young women have mental problems. Add to that the fact that the average American woman is just under 5 feet 4 inches and weighs 170 pounds. Spoiler alert: attractive actresses and models are significantly taller than that and weigh about forty pounds less. If that wasn’t bad enough, young women tend to be extremely picky. One study showed women a representative sample of men and found that on average 80% of men were deemed unattractive. However, women, in fairness probably aren’t that ridiculous. People do still get married so females are obviously more fussy in theory than in practice.

Men also have the risk of an unjust family law system where a divorce would mean financial ruin. Given that about half of marriages fail you can understand why men are joining the MGTOW (Men Going Their Own Way) movement or practice avoiding marriage. This is especially true of those prized men who make over $100,000. Financially, the better off a man is, the more he is better off avoiding marriage. Interestingly I know of no self-described feminist who walked away from a marriage without taking the poor schmuck to the cleaners proving that feminism is less about female happiness and more about hating men. Besides, thanks to promiscuity men have more access to sex. Ironically, because women are more promiscuous and now tend to have more lovers in a before marriage than men, they are less desirable. Men have a genetic pre-disposition to eschew women to sleep around. This is to avoid ending up being responsible for the lineage of another man. Until recently, most men required their wives to be virgins on their wedding nights.

This situation is a crisis and not only because young men and women have become so lonely. Family formation is down and most Western nations need to import immigrants or suffer the fate of Japan which has been in decline for over three decades. Sadly, high IQ men and women are not reproducing enough and to be brutal, the undeniable fact is that almost no nation with an average IQ of below 90 would qualify as developed. Much of IQ is inherited from both parents. Smart parents, tend to have smart kids. A child, on average with tend to be more influenced by their mothers than fathers when it comes to IQ. In the West, smarter women are having less children and are older when they have them. Conversely, less educated and intelligent women are having more children and start reproducing at a younger age than their more cognitively developed sisters.

All is not lost. Women can reject the narcissistic and maladaptiveness and our current political and social culture by engaging in self-awareness. That does not mean being a slave to a man. It means being a partner worth sharing a life with. Good marriages aren’t about power and exploration. They are about mutual respect, co-operation, character. I asked a young friend of mine what he wanted in a girlfriend or wife. Wise beyond his years, he simply told me: “someone who’s got my back.”